I wanted to acknowledge Mother’s Day in some way because being a mother is a such a huge part of my life. But this year, having lost my own mother less than a month ago, I can’t focus on it. It hurts like nothing else. There’s so much I want to share. I owe my obsession with beauty products and making sure I look my best to my mum. I will be forever indebted to her for nurturing my love of reading and writing as a child to the point where I do both almost religiously, even now. I want to share the anecdotes of watching her do her ‘face’, of buying products together and the vast amount of mine that she borrowed, but right now I can’t.
Mother’s Day without my mum was incredibly hard, so instead I focused on her legacy and the love she had for grandchildren. That will never be forgotten. This post is about those little girls that she was most proud of. My daughters. Her grandchildren.
Being a mother is a huge part of my life. It’s true when people say that becoming a parent irrevocably changes your life. I’m not one to sugar-coat the role of mother and say that it’s easy because frankly, it’s not. It is the hardest and most challenging role I’ve ever undertaken. It is however an amazing role and one I realise that I am blessed to have.
In the four years since my eldest daughter was born, I’ve learnt an awful lot of new skills. Motherhood has been the making of me. I can now survive on the bare minimum of sleep, multi-task to perfection, and also recite the theme tune to Paw Patrol in my sleep.
I aim to be the best role model that I can for my two daughters. However, I’ve recently come to realise that as tiny as they are, they’ve taught me many things too. Learning is a lifelong process and I’m starting to realise that anyone can teach me something as long as I’m receptive to the lesson. My little girls are so different, everyone comments on that but as different they are, together they have taught me three important skills.
The biggest lesson that I’m learning from my daughters is confidence. My first born is so confident and loves herself. Her self-confidence is amazing and knows no limits. She makes me smile as she struts around our home singing Girl on Fire by Alicia Keys. My daughter is amazing, and she knows it. She doesn’t worry about what to wear, or what people think of her. This girl used to turn up to nursery in sparkly wellies, an Elsa dress and twenty different coloured hair clips because that’s how she felt happiest that day. She isn’t concerned with the criticism of others and dresses only for herself and for the day’s weather.
Be an extrovert
In a similar vein, my younger daughter is incredibly sociable. I’m naturally am introvert. So, it is amazing to see my daughter make friends with ease and watch the way she charms people. She will interact with anybody that she meets and as she’s young, she has no judgement or preconceived ideas to stop her from befriending someone. In her eyes, everybody is a potential friend.
The most important lesson that I am going to take from my daughters is to be fearless. My elder daughter is quite cautious by nature, just like her mama, but the baby? There is nothing that she won’t attempt. If she wants something, then she is going to get it by any means possible. She fears nothing and is unstoppable when she fixates on something.
If she fails the first time she tries, she gets straight back up and tries again. I hope she never grows out of it and that she continues to strive for everything that she wants. This is something that I need to do also. I need to stop letting fear dominate my thoughts and prevent me from reaching my goals.
My little girl isn’t scared to try but neither of them are scared admit when they can’t do something. Both of them know to come to me or her sister for help and aren’t afraid to show a weakness.
I need to work on this. I’m too reluctant to ask for help until it’s too late and asking for help is the last resort. Because of my fear, I don’t always get what I want. My daughter can’t say the same. She nearly always gets what she wants.
Normally, on Mother’s Day, I am reflecting on my relationship with my own mum and how grateful I am to be her daughter. Today that is too painful. But I am always going to be her daughter and these little girls are always going to be mine. Mother’s Day 2017 is the a day for reflecting on myself as a mum and the fact that I my little girls are growing to be be strong, happy, intelligent and beautiful little girls is a testament not only to myself but the skills that my mum instilled in me, without her I wouldn’t be the mother I am today. Happy Mother’s Day Mum. xxx
Like this post? Pin It!